When you are saying “YES” and not feeling it at all

In last few years, I have finally learned how to say ‘NO’ and earn it! It has been liberating to say the least!

I have come to the realization that saying ‘no’ to something that I do not feel like doing or to something that I feel obliged to do (which often is the case), means that I actually will spent less time with my family or spent less time doing what I really want to be doing. Does that make sense to you?

I think that we need balance in our lives. I also think that we will always be searching for it somehow. We are responsible for creating that balance, for making mistakes and then learning from our mistakes in order for us to continue our path of growth.

I invite you to make a few observations that have helped me a lot. These observations can help you to the understanding of why you do the things you do:

– How often do you say ‘yes’ when you do not feel like it at all?
– How often do you feel stressed because of obligations that you have said yes to, and did not really want to do?
– Are you saying yes often, when you are not feeling it at all?
– What is it that makes you say ‘yes’ instead of ‘no’?

Look for your reasons:

– Are you a trying to make everyone happy (but yourself)?
– Is it possible to make everyone happy (including yourself)?
– Are you afraid of conflict?
– Would you like to feel significant and important?

Remember that you always have a choice.

Try to think about all the times that you have said ‘yes’ without feeling it.

Now, sum up the minute/ hours and even days that you could have been doing things that were REALLY important to you.

Evaluate what the price of saying ‘yes’ is.
What will happen if you say ‘no’?

Would you like to challenge yourself?

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Cathrine Tveen – Online Life Coach